Folk Tales No. 24

Romeo and Julia ..

We all know about Juliet in Romeo’s life, but we never asked if there was anyone else in his when he was courting Juliet.

So our story began.

“Romeo, where art’ thou? I have waited for hours and the pies are cold’ such was the thoughts of Rosaline who was secretly in love with Romeo. She knew that Romeo was with his other love, Juliet, but she cares not for the other woman, as long as Romeo has a place for her, even though it may be negligiblel.

As she sat there, her thoughts went back to the romance of the two lovers, unblessed by each clans of both sides. It was all a stupid brawl which resulted in this curse to the lovers, but if Romeo had seen his ways better, he would not had to suffer this pain. He was actually to see me at the ball but he met instead Juliet. It was not planned as I was in the powder room and someone took too much raw oyster, so we were all detained slightly longer. It was that moment of time, Romeo met Juliet when he came looking for me at the powder room. Juliet was last in the queue, so he asked if she seen me, Rosaline.

‘Rosaline Capulet? No, she must had stepped out. I am Juliet Capulet, her cousin. Are you a Capulet too? I thought I knew all the Capulet’s suitors.’ Now the young man was amused at the introduction of this catchy spunky lady in the marron dress.

‘I am afraid not. I am Romeo Montague, son of your fathers’ rival and bitter enemy now. But I am very pleased to meet you. Have I seen you in a brawl before? I guess not, as it may not be your style to kick someone’s butt.’ Romeo ever the infallible man of his trade, had on his ever charming smile.

‘Oh, Romeo. No wonder the oyster was bad today, we should had knew you will be bring it along.’ Juliet was a firm supporter of her dad. And a Montague is a Montague even though he looked nice in those pantaloons.

‘Oh, pardon me for the oyster, but we did not know you have no cold room. Why should you when the ladies are so cold, they can freeze even hell itself.’

Juliet was upset at the remark and said; ‘I shall prove to you my coldness’. She took him in her arms and lay a kiss on his warm lips, which smell of sherry and some brandy too. He in return kissed her tasteless oyster lips and a lover bond was created.

And on that night, I regretted not getting my diaper on or I won’t had Romeo taken away by Juliet. My heart was more broken when they consumated their love without the parent’s blessing, and even when she was supposed to marry the Count. Given the choice, I would had.

I was also sad, that I consulted the Friar for the potion to end my woes, but he was too inquisitive, so I lied to him, and said it was for some lost lovers friends of mine. He must had seen my lies and made a sleeping potion instead. He was reading ‘Sleeping Beauty’ that day. And the rest you knew, she got drunk and slept, and he went into grief on her dead like sleep, he drank the other potion and died. I did tell him before, self prescription sometimes is fatal. But as he laid dead, she has to follow suit was unbelievable.

I guess like me now, I am still baking pies for my ‘dead should be lover’, and hoped he will come back to eat them. Fat chance at that, as I normally eat them all myself. So much as its had been therapuetic to me, and now I find any excuse to bake a pie. And a successful franchise called ‘Julia’s Pies; the taste to die for like lovers when you eat it’.

And I re-named myself to Julia, so one day, someone will tell my side of the story too. Guess not, as no one reads the small print on the packaging anymore.

( Love is a contagious bond that can sometimes caused behaviour changes that can be detrimental to health. So consult your ‘doctor’ before you try anything. And don’t self prescribed love potions; it can be fatal. )