I wished Captain Haddock had read this.

An off the trail Tintin adventure

 

 

 

Some years back, one early morning in Paris, bleary-eyed from a long flight, with hours yet to wait before I could check-in to my hotel (and perilously little money in my pocket), I stood perched against a stone wall overlooking the Seine. ( Yes, of course, it *was* near the Pont Neuf, however did you know? ) I was thinking, very precisely, of nothing. A handsome man -- whistling -- passed behind me, and gave a quick, hard, practiced pinch to my behind, saying: Elle est belle, la Seine...

He gifted me with a broad smile and a wink, never missed a beat, and was gone in a flash. It was one of the moments of my life. I threw back my head, my face and hair shining in the sun, my laughter unrestrained. I was so free; I was so beautiful. And carefree.

So I thought it was then.

"Mille millions de mille milliards de mille sabords!" I knew that expression well. I turned to my right and saw my dear Paddock ( I do have a tough time remembering his name. ) striding towards me with the unkempt beard and seafarer Captain cap, with his turtleneck under the salt encrusted blazer and pants. He took up the sextant to positioned on his right eye and kept on muttering between 'miserable slugs' to pickled herring'.

Now could a lady be ignored on the bridge among the lovely scene of Paris. I strolled up to him, and tapped him on his left forearm. He looked over and went into hysterics over my presence.

"Madame Castafiore, I am so sorry that I have ignored your beauty on this lovely day. But the acts of the 'bashi-bazouk' have taken over my mind, with Tintin in pursuit on the speed boat." Captain Haddock took the courtesy bow while removing his cap. I extended my hand to him but he was unsure which to discard for the honor; the sextant or the cap. Both are his treasured items of his crusade at sea. I made the decision for him by stepping up on my toes to kiss his left cheek.

"Are you on visit to Paris? Staying long perhaps?" The man was a wonderful creature; a man never at ease on land and among ladies. His manners are like the unpredictable sea conditions, but the waves are a caress of smoothness.

"Yes, I am...." I could not recalled why I was in Paris. "On holiday would be the correct expression. I was just enjoying the.."

"Holiday? Then you must come to Marlinspike Hall." The Captain forgotten his quest had me whisked off to the nearby jetty where a seaplane was parked. I wanted to tell him that the Hall was in Belgium but the Captain was past from listening, as he gunned up the plane. He spoke nothing; which was an opposite as he spoke a lot on the adventures with Tintin. I guessed he was nervous with my presence and speaking aloud kept him sane.

I enjoyed the ride; sailing on the air over Paris city to the countryside, past more villages unknown to me, and then we landed at Marlinspike Hall.

"Bienvenue à Markinspike Salle" Captain Haddock presented me to his home, after we had landed on the green turf and destroyed some lovely lilies plants with the carnations in the side crashing landing. "My flying time was shorter than my sea faring hours. So pardon me for the rough landing."

Who would? There I was at the home of the infamous Captain Haddock.

"Who in the blinking mind would land a plane here?" I heard the voice and matched it to the faithful Nestor. The balding man with the short sideburns was in his gardening tweeds paused on seeing me.

"Madame Castafiore. Welcome back." We had met and duel on a couple of misunderstanding, but we remain good acquaintance's. "I was tending to the lawn just now. Guess, I would be getting back to my work."

Nestor took to his gardening works, while the Captain was pulling out the weeds from his uniform. He had backed up into the bush by mistake, thinking it was the way to the Hall.

"I am lost most times on land." I smiled at his smirky excuse. Now, I must tell you of Marlinspike Hall. Its a large and luxurious dwelling adorned with numerous works of art, antique furniture, and a gallery of the Haddock family's treasures. The grounds comprise a park with extensive woodlands, wide lawns, a rose garden, a high surrounding wall, at least two gates, a neighboring meadow, and at least one adjacent building, used by Professor Calculus as a laboratory. They were afraid he would bring the whole Hall down if he done that in the basement. Despite the size of the house and park, only the faithful Nestor, who serves as butler to the Hall attend to its every need.

We entered the great hallway of the Marlinspike Hall. Its does lack the ladies touch with shades and the deplorable arrangement of paintings; Picasso next to Andy Warhol. Its like placing Marilyn Monroe next Thatcher. Surprisingly, the marble flooring was waxed; I can't deny Nestor was one of the best in the trade. The Captain took me by my hand to lead me to the Library. It was nice of him to had held it instead of conjuring distances with the sextant.

"Madame Castafiore, behold my masterpiece of yourself." I would admit being shown myself in the nude truly embarrassed me, but to be posed like the Goddess of Venus took the 'limbs out of my anatomy'. Captain Haddock looked at me.

"I can assured you that your vanity was never peeked on. I swear by the oath of Poseidon or he would wreck my sails on high seas." Captain Haddock voiced out sheepishly. "I did however had the centerfold from Paris for reference."

My gracious, he had the piece I did for the Vogue then. They did touchup some curves and ends. I felt so lost then, but the Captain had his courtesy extended with a armchair for me to plod my squeaky legs, and soon the glass of scotch had landed on my side table.

"Madame, please take up the hospitality of the Hall..." Captain Haddock was to said more but the untimely, unruly, and undignified to appear then came the inquisitive journalist Tintin with his countryside style of tweeds and insufferable dog yapping at the feet. He did paused to say hello to me.

"Madame Castafiore, pardon me but we have a treasure map with us." With those simple words, my desirable, unkempt, sea salted, and host ( perhaps the last one was more courteous to add in. ) peaked up his cap and ran off with the twerp. Never was a peck or even a force me down kiss on the lips, he was out of the Hall. I picked myself up, and walked to the garden through the high glass door. There I saw Nestor leading a group of camera toting far eastern characters up the lawn towards the Hall.

"家にこの方法" Nestor was telling them. I stopped the balding man and questioned them.

"I am taking them inside. They paid the fees for the tour. Its our side income to maintained the place." Nestor explained. "You could assist."

Well, to be a guide in the Hall of my love. I be doggone if I am sit that one out.

"ボートこの道のハドック船長のコレクション." I knew learning Japanese would give me some opportunities in life. Since then, I have held the hurricane lamp by the window for my Captain, but he hardly noticed as his voyages of cases with Tintin seems be never ending.

Such was the love one had to endured for a certain Captain Haddock.

"Barnacles!" My Captain's back. I looked out and saw the man struggling with the Arabian girl in the scanty costume. I stepped out and gave her a lesson in savate; courtesy of Nestor' weekend training.

Note:

"家にこの方法" - This way to the House

"ボートこの道のハドック船長のコレクション." - Captain Haddock collection of boats this way.