My worthless Life
Author's Note: This is
a view from a man who has resigned to his fate of life. He was interviewed while
living on the streets. He felt that he need to correct the view on that.
Contests rules:
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Funny that you
would mention living on the streets when I thought we were all living off the
streets all this time. For this hot cup of cocoa, maybe I can tell you what it was
like living daily off the streets. Don't get me wrong as I am no vagabond or a
hobo as some of you may have presumed from my manners and dressing but I was
like you before.
I was born to a family
of love and care, with some siblings. Our parents were hard workers to earn the
money to bring food and shelter to our home. We lived in cramped conditions but
we were close to each other. The food we have on the tables was shared by all in
whatever proportion that was given by our parents. We never complained of any
uneven distribution but we took all that was given. I hardly see my dad when I was
young, as he leaves the house before dawn and comes back after we sleep, but
when I do sees him is only on the day we are to pray. We did not go to no house
of faith but we prayed as a family for the days we had endured and hope for the
days of better times to come.
Well, it did as we
all grew up educated and soon earns a living like many others. Among all the
siblings, I was armed with a piece of paper that said I am qualified and the
world was mine to partake in its riches. But I find myself joining the labor
force jousting for jobs in the weak economy then, but I was determined to make
it soon. I did and landed my first job with the pittance of remuneration but it
was money to buy food for the family.
My family then
which included my parents and soon to come was my own family with a working
wife that brings in the money to make the needs of life ever reachable by us.
It was comforting then although we lived the days to the month-end and watched
the coffers filled up for another round of spending. We had added
responsibilities with the aged and young ones, but the coffer ever stretched to
meet the commitments.
Then the storm
came; she was taken to ill and I am to hold the bastion. As the struggle comes
in, so do the troubles of ill intents. When you tried to find dreams in these
moments, the nightmares appeared most of the time. The greed of man takes with
no remorse nor care of your concerns. He takes without mercy and hides behind
his lies of just duties. You looked into your coffer and you laid your tears to
it, hoping like living plants they would grow. But let me tell you, that a tree
needs more than sunshine and fresh air. It needs nutrients in this plot of land
we all lived on.
Bone weary with
mind flayed by the endless thoughts of wishing for a miracle, my limbs have to
move or the coffer won't be filled. It may be for days as I toiled to ensure
all that is needed in the family is taken care of. I stripped the luxuries we
once had and maintained the needful only, and that also in the bare portions enough
to move onto another day. Soon I find even my hours get depleted but the needs
of the family ever increased. I weep for the children but my limbs could do so
much.
Does God know as
he was said to be ever knowing? If so why does he forsake us when we never did
on him. Its moments like this I asked myself, is life worth living at all? Why give
me hope when young and then take it away when older? If it's the sins of the
forefathers we bear, then let them be one who suffered and not the young ones
who know not of their action. Pardon me, I am to announce to you; the God does
not exist in my life anymore but the Devil does as he taunts some of us with his
motives. When we are removed from this plane of existence, I would tell him to send
me not back to here for I am not interested in his silly games. Let me be a free
spirit with no care or concern of any in my mind.
But comes what
now, I have to live off it as I walked these streets looking to earn my worth
of that single dust of gold among the dirt and grime. But mind you it's not by
bad means but an honest mean. I would do what my body allowed me and not bring
on more misery to my soul by adding in sins. I ought to be leaving now as it's
time for me to rejoin my family. I thank you for the hot drink and you should
thank God as he had mercy on your soul.
Me? I am thinking
there is a street which I can live off of it.
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